I was hanging out with my niece last night, watching a movie together. Ended up talking most of the way through it instead.
She’s nine.
And when she was only a toddler her mother committed suicide while my (step) niece and nephew were in the other room. As an adult, I can barely find a way to process that entire situation. I don’t know how to explain it, how to rationalize, how to “be with”, how to accept the reality.
But here was this young child, sometimes seeming years older than she really is, telling me last night something that totally blew me out of the water.
She told me she has decided something and wondered if I wanted to hear.
She started talking about how we all only use ten percent of our brains. And in turn, we only use ten percent of our potential. She believes her mother, free from the restrictions of a human, physical form, a form that only actualizes ten percent of all potential during an eighty year lifespan, is now completely free to use all the potential that ever was and ever could be. Nothing holding her back. So she can give herself to Audrey in a way no one else can. She can do things that Audrey can’t “see” because her mom is “behind the scenes” and working beyond what she could have done trapped and locked in a body that was racked with pain and swallowed by addiction. Her best friend now protects and guides and helps her more than she could have if she were here. She ended her little speech by saying, "I really do think everything happens for a reason. Everything."
I’m impacted hugely every day by the family I’ve been gifted with. Amazed sometimes. Rendered speechless often.
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